Wednesday, March 31, 2010
I stand here as an apprentice tenor next to this guy . This mans voice inspires me to feel good about my self and helps me direct my own voice to help warm my soul and let it come out and heal me some how . Song helps as a door way to our soul open up and replenishes any heart ache we may have, if only for a moment we are transformed in to another space where we are safe from harm ....
Please take time to listen and watch these guys or if you are lucky enough .. go and see them live .. I wish to do so one day ...
Blessings to you all once again ..
Gary Darbyshire ...
" Lullaby " performed by Vocal Spectrum - barbershop Quartet from USA ...
Monday, March 29, 2010
3 weeks 38 years and 3000 memories that mean I love you Dad ..
Next time you say good bye to your Son Hug him tightly and tell him just how much you love him and neve ever forget it ……
The opportunity to hug or embrace my son as his Dad is one I always treasure. Whether it is to tell him good luck in his pursuits, whether it is to say Sorry for some thing I have said or to console him for something he has done or has been affected by and just needs hid dads reassurance that every thing is ok.
The gentle touch we give our children , that shows just how much we care. The times we are there for them in their lives when they really just want some one to talk to . The birthdays , the holidays , the days when they are so so angry with the world and no matter what we say to them its all out fault and how dare we interfere in their lives and yet a few hours later they are laughing and carrying on as if nothing has happened .
The first school day , the first girlfriend , their fist goal scored at soccer on a wet windy day at a sportsground that is not even covered . The moments of pure admiration when they graduate from high school , and the pride we have as a parents when we se them helping others ads if it is just second nature .
The crying when you send them too their room for something they did wrong feeling in your heart that may be you were too harsh but they needed to learn right from wrong .
Now imagine for a moment if you never got to experience that as a dad or never received it from your Dad … After 38 years I began to experience some of those things.
In my last story , I told you all about my experiences and feeling as I flew up to meet my dad . I was asked to write a follow up but before I wrote it I thought it important to set the scene so you all could appreciate at a deeper level what most Dad s take for granted..
So what happened after thirty eight years? Well for the first few days we talked and talked and talked .. I had so many questions to ask of him I wanted to know why he left? . I wanted to know what happened between him and my mother, and I really wanted to know , if he really loved me after so long and living so far away in England .
Those questions were foremost in my mind. As we talked so many emotions bubbled away inside me and as we spoke so many memories of my child hood came flooding back . Almost as quickly as they came so did the tears . tears streaming down my face emotions coming back to visit me from days gone by . I guess after such a long time my love for him was still there and it had decided to show its self over a dew hot steamy days in Brissie .
I knew now that he had not abandoned me , I knew now that hew needed to go so my life would be a better one . I also knew that he cried so hard for may weeks . he told me that when he boarded the plane in Sydney to leave his children behind that he said to some one next to him on the plane that he had just said good bye to his family for the last time and thought he would never ever get to hold them or kiss them good night , that he would never be able to laugh with them and he would never be able to be there for them ever ..
I also knew how it had affected me emotionally over these years an how I had suffered emotionally in the way I am in my life . I also new that my tears would be happier ones now as I held him as my dad again after so so long ..
Over the few weeks of him being here we got to know each other a little more , we spent a week camping and he was able to meet my so so caring wife and children . the grand children he never knew as little babies so he never had the chance to know them until now as teenagers . This was a little strange but he coped .
My wife spent time with him and go to know more of the deep and meaningful stuff and used her womanly nurturing skills to make him warm in side again . Even if it meant accidentally walking to a nudist beach near our camp site and being totally surprised with what lay before them .. They had no idea that the other and of the camping beach was reserved for such activities ????
As many of you here are aware I am a singer and by some sort of co incidence so is my Dad . How amazing !!! While in Brisbane we sang together in front of a packed café in Brisbane’s beach suburbs .. Yep after 38 years between drinks we sang together at a gig with another singer for 35 minutes .. We sang ballads , blues and a few barber shop sort of songs . You see my dad sang in pubs and clubs singing Perry Como covers and the crooners songs of the sixties , seventies and eighties .. He also stopped after a dark spot there with depression and vowed never to sing again until finally in that café in Brisbane I brought him back in to the light , those coincidences again ..
While staying with my family I showed him many of the old haunts he used to know and also a few places which brought back some dark memories he realty needed to confront . Also bringing back a few I didn’t even know I had my self ..
After thirty eight years , three weeks and countless memories shared and songs played it was time for him to go . I drove him to the airport with probably the most sombre mood I had been in . It was time to say good bye . We pulled to the side of the road and I knew then that once again after thirty eight years it was time to go . My emotions were peaking, my eyes were filling up and I was ready to cry out
“Don’t go Dad, Don’t leave us, please not again???!!!!!
“ Don’t leave us again “”
“We love you “ ..
But this time it was different I hugged him because I knew he wasn’t. I kissed him on the cheek as my dad used to kiss me and simply said
“Thank you Dad , Thank you for coming , see you soon “ I love you mate
My Dad hugged me and simply said
“ I love you now and have always loved you , see you soon Gary “
And with that he was gone from my life … but this time hopefully for not as long ..
So next time you see your son or see you dad give them a little hug and tell them just how much you love them .. no matter what ..
Till next time
Dare to think the un thinkable
Dare to love the un lovable
Love you first
Love all in the world that is good
Love even those who may not be so great
As you spread love you attract love .
As you receive love others receive it too
When you wake up in the morning
Be at peace with yourself
Be at peace with your loved ones
Be at peace with the world
Breathe in Love
Breathe out deeper love .
There the world is ready to receive you and all you have to give ..
Get out there !!!
And Peace will be all around for all of us .... Dare to dream
Gary Darbyshire (c) 2010
please share me ... and share the love ..
Wednesday, March 24, 2010
Tuesday, March 23, 2010
As he made his way along the beach with the sun trying ever so hard to slow him down as if being directed by another source , he continued to push his now heavily burdened soul through the refreshing white water, as it lapped up against him to say hello like a puppy dog tugging at his ankle
After three days his mind was awash with memories of a past he had to live again . A past where up until recently was of only one track , missing the other side of the record . The “ B “ side . finally after 45 years of existence on this planet deep seeded emotions were now bubbling below the surface .
Gary looked inside his mind and saw his alter ego walking through the cold recesses scouring on graffiti ladened walls of his soul where etched in darkened crevices were the emotions he had forgotten how to use …
The last three days had seen him learn much of his father’s experience . Well at least the jigsaw pieces that had been missing for so long were at least on the board . he now understood a little more about emotions which until now hew had fought to understand . repressed memories of a different life to which now looked so so foreign .now had a chance to come out and talk to him
He would not stop walking this path until he was able to talk to his soul and summoned all the issues forward to then deal with and get to know personally . there was no turning back in his mind now ..
It was going to be a long road to walk and as the sun disappeared behind the clouds above him he knew the summoning was about to begin .. He would meet his past and bring it back to the future . He …..
……….To be continued ….. on my journey back to happiness ..
Wednesday, March 17, 2010
Gary Darbyshire 2010
Enjoy and share ..
Blessings to all ...
If we spend a moment in our busy day to just reflect who we are and why we are here, even if we don't quite know , We open our minds to wonderful opportunities . Meditation and self reflection are ways of looking in to our souls . Inspiring music and pictures like these below are an example of creating a multimedia experience for us to just be ...
As my journey continues and as I heal , I look back at times when I was down and perplexed with life . The one constant I had which kept me on an even keel if only for a moment was the synergy of music words and the visuals my sad mind would conjour up . As I meditated I allowed my self to wonder what may be and where I may be or when may I be . Inspiring music allowed me to attract positive thoughts into my mind ..
Imagine the beautiful visuals Andrea Bocelli must have when he sings this song knowing he cannot see like many of us . Use all the senses you have to heighten your experience of life if you are not a full sensory person learn to be so you may experience all that God created you to be .
Enjoy the video .and dream with those eyes open ...
Gary Darbyshire 2010
Saturday, March 6, 2010
Singing helped me come back from some dark days in my life . God had a hand too I am sure . So moral is sing and praise all that is around you . be happy to know you may have never suffered but know that some one is watching over you if you do
Sing and let your soul smile !!
Blessings to all my readers ...
Wednesday, March 3, 2010
Yesterday some one I work with was given to God . He was some ones father , someones son , someones brother and some ones lover, he went hopefully to a better place where at least his mind would now be at peace, now more than ever he would be missed by all those who he thought he could live with out
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If you or some one you know suffers from depression . Please please ask for help ... please
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God bless you all
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